Τετάρτη, 22 Μαΐου 2013

Jar-Pet


Intelligent, Playful, Resourceful Jar-Pet For Adoption!



Are you a busy, energetic person with too much responsibility and too little time on their hands? Do you feel like a regular pet requires too much care for you to handle? Thankfully, I have the solution!
The Jar-Pet is the kind of pet that’s a perfect fit for your everyday life! A chance for you to both be a pet owner and focus on your career at the same time! What’s a Jar-Pet, you’ll ask? It’s the answer to your prayers!

I found my Jar-Pet in my home’s cellar, where it had been abandoned by its previous owner, mere days before the tragic death of himself and his family. Upon discovering it, I realized that it was very intelligent, conversant and highly adaptable. The Jar-Pet is fluent in a number of languages (a number of them, I was later informed, long since dead) and has knowledge of a number of subjects, up to (and including) extinct culture customs!

But that’s not all there is to the perks of a Jar-Pet! The Jar-Pet is also highly resilient and can subsist for weeks without food, air or water. It is highly resistant to harm and also immune to standard pet diseases, requiring no vaccination whatsoever! It requires absolutely no care, except for occasional mental stimulation (a mutually beneficial arrangement!).

It is important to mention, however, that at no time are you to remove the Jar-Pet from its container (which is provided FOR FREE). The Jar-pet is resourceful and may immediately seek shelter in a hard-to-reach area of the house, where it might nest, thus becoming a nuisance! 

Interested in adopting a Jar-Pet? Then call the number below!

WARNING: The Jar-Pet is not intended to be owned by, or exposed to, children. It must not be kept in a room containing -or exposed to- religious symbols. Owners of the Jar-Pet accept full responsibility for its dietary needs at the moment of adoption. Should the Jar-Pet nest and/or breed inside a tenement the previous owner holds no responsibility toward its actions. The previous owner cannot be held accountable for any injury or loss of human life caused by the Jar-Pet.

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